Mind Makeover

 Friendship is a powerful tool to build a happy, healthy life! I remember my Dad telling me once that a good way to judge someone’s character is to take a look at their long term friendships and if they don’t have any then they shouldn’t be trusted.   And, I have to say, I’ve found it to be very true.   If you can’t maintain long-term bonds with people you have a shared history with that either means you’ve chosen bad people as friends and you’ve justifiably removed them from your life.   Or, it means there’s something wrong with you and your behaviours, because they have removed themselves from your life.   Either way, it’s worth contemplating.   The type of friends we choose reflects the type of person we truly are at heart because, as we know, like attracts like.   If your friendship circle includes people of nefarious character then you will be characterised this way too.   If your friendship circle includes spiritual or religious people then you will be characterised this way too.

You don't need to be your biggest critic because there will be plenty of other people volunteering for that role! I have come to realise that my own internal dialogue is far more critical and limiting than any external dialogue from others could ever be.   Our inner critic can be beneficial in keeping us focused on improving ourselves, and our lives, by not allowing us to rest on our laurels and continually guiding us toward further improvement and goal setting.    That subconscious critic can be an extremely motivating force.   It can sharpen our conscious focus on things that are subconsciously worrying us - things like whether we’re fully utilising our skills and talents in our chosen jobs; whether we even enjoy the jobs or careers that we have; whether we’re truly happy where we live; whether we’re fulfilled in our relationships; whether we are becoming the person we aspired to be when we were younger.     But that subconscious critic can also be debilitatingly powerful in caus

Stop being a happiness delayer! As humans we can all fall victim to the ‘some day’ scenario for different aspects of our life.   We might envisage that ‘some day’ we’ll learn another language, start eating healthier, get a job that we enjoy, go on an overseas holiday or, ultimately, be happy.   We may think we’ll feel happy when we live in a bigger house, get a better job, have more money or find our lifelong partner.   Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if you’re not happy now then you won’t be happy then either.   And who’s stopping you from being happy now? There are some people who seem to be blessed with the happy gene and appear to be able to enjoy life no matter what hurdles are placed in front of them.   I would love to be one of those people but, unfortunately, that’s not my natural default.    I’m more of a “I’ll be happy once I’ve got all of these jobs completed” or “once I’ve resolved this difficult problem” type of person.   I’m a happiness delayer!   And I hav

Is fear of failure making you a spectator of your own life? Many of us are raised to fear failure, whether it be in the classroom, on the sporting field, in our chosen professions or in life itself.   It’s almost embedded into us that it’s impossible to make a triumphant comeback from failure and that if we allow failure into our lives it will destroy any chance we have of succeeding in any way whatsoever.   This is rubbish!   And it is perpetuated by people who want to keep you small, compliant, subservient and unhappy. Failure is one of the best teachers we could ever hope for.   Undoubtedly, it’s not pleasant at the time, but we learn so much from it that we should actively strive to fail as many times as we possibly can.   Because if we’re failing it means that we are venturing into uncharted territory; that we’re exposing ourselves to new experiences and challenges; that we’re delving  into new theories, ideas and principles; that we’re taking risks.   Life is not meant to be stee